Crazy owner (10)
Paula had no choice but to use the central staircase again because the number of books stacked was so large that it obscured her eyes. She had to use the stairs at the back of the mansion; if anyone saw her, she would be punished, so she walked quickly.
“Master, I will read this again.”
“It’s been a long time since you went to the library.”
“I chose carefully. I hope you enjoy listening this time.”
The girl opened the book she brought with her.
" - Once upon a time, there lived a happy little pig. The happy little pig was so happy to spend every day..."
“What are you doing?”
"-What? What are you talking about?"
When asked, pretending that she didn't know, she made an innocent expression on her face.
“This is a book of fairy tales.”
" - Yes. This is a book of fairy tales."
“Are you sure you want to read this?”
“I think reading a book of fairy tales would be ideal for you right now.”
" - What?"
“I decided that the most important thing was to read a fairy tale that tells a touching story about caring for a grumpy owner so that he can find peace of mind.”
Vincent made a ridiculous expression on his face. Paula glanced casually at the storybook.
" - If you need anything, please tell me. From the story of the lucky pig to the little errand girl, the friendship between a boy and a fairy who gives anything, the mysterious adventure of a brother and sister, the love and peace of a blue bird. Any story is here. I have prepared several books because you said that you do not read books that you have already read. Please choose according to your liking."
She was sure that he had not read a single book about it. Having said this, he closed his mouth. Veins bulged on the back of her hand, which was clenching as if it were about to rip the sheet to shreds.
"If you don't want to, I'll continue reading the story of the happy pig. You wouldn't be able to listen to even the shortest part, would you? I don't think you'll be that impatient, but if you're still having trouble listening, please tell me."
She spat out the words so he wouldn't interrupt her and quickly began reading a children's book. Maybe her words had an effect, this time he was calm. She seemed to have stopped breathing and was a little nervous, but fortunately she was able to finish reading the storybook.
Of course he threw away the next children's book.
* * *
Paula continued to read to him from then on. It was, of course, a book of fairy tales. He said no, but the girl continued. Using this as an excuse, she wanted to read some books.
It had been a long time since she had read a book. The bookstore where she worked as a child was forced to close due to the illness of the old owner. He apologized to her and gave her some books as a gift. Most of them were fairy tales.
However, children's books fell into Alicia's hands. Due to Alicia's nature of coveting and seeing what Paula has and not showing interest in reading the books, they were torn apart when they returned to Paula's hand and she couldn't even recognize the outline. The torn books were eventually used as paper to fuel the stove.
After this it was difficult to access books. Paula saved money several times, but stopped when her father caught her. Buying books was also a luxury for the daughter of a poor peasant. She stopped reading when she discovered that she could have bought more food for the day with that money.
Maybe it was because she hadn't read books for so long, so she was glad to be able to hold these books in her hands, except for the current situation.
“Is that all you can read?”
“What are you unhappy with?”
" - That's it. I'm dissatisfied with everything connected with this."
Again, again.
Maybe it was because of reading a fairy tale. Paula continued to get annoyed. In fact, she wanted to read another book, but he didn't listen to her properly, and reading to someone turned out to be more difficult than she thought. So, knowing that he didn't like it, Paula had no choice but to pick up the children's book again.
When she sighed, he became angry and asked why she was sighing. It was also the first time he knew that she was such a good seager.
(note from the translator: the meaning of the word “Siger” is not known, what was meant in this context, I didn’t understand it myself)
“If you're going to read this, first learn to breathe.”
" - Sorry".
" - Get out. I don't want to hear anything else."
In the end, Paula was kicked out with a book that couldn't turn three pages. Anyway, she bought it and struggled with reading it while she was with Vincent, but she was fine.
Thanks to this, when she returned to her room after finishing work, she slept as if she had fainted every time. The day's weariness brought her to sleep. However, she could not sleep soundly because she had many worries. This made her light sleep easier.
In the next room, she also heard the sound of something hitting the wall.
It was quite loud. In addition, it was coming from the owner's room.
Startled, she ran into the next room.
The girl opened the door and entered the dark room. She looked straight at the bed and saw a round figure crouched against the wall.
[Mister?]
As she approached, the figure trembled, but there was no reaction.
“Where are you?”
"…"
" - Master".
"…"
" - Master?"
" - ...Who is this".
There was no strength in the muffled voice.
“It’s me. What are you doing?”
“I had a dream.”
"Were you asleep? What was the dream about?"
“ - A terrifying dream.”
[Oh, you had a nightmare. I do this a lot too, so I know what it's like.]
But Paula looked around to see what that loud noise was that she heard a while ago, but there was nothing that could make a loud sound. She wondered if he had thrown something, as usual, but there was no sign.
It was dark at night, so it was difficult to make out details. Vincent also had his face covered with a sheet, so she couldn't check on his condition. His hand holding the sheet trembled slightly.
“What dream did you have?”
“I don’t know. I don’t remember.”
It was a calm voice, but what was hidden in it was deep fear. She knew from Isabella that he could not sleep well. And that the painful moans heard at night belonged to him. But he didn't show her this.
What kind of nightmares did he have?
She knew it without even thinking about it. This must be a terrible, terrifying dream.
"It's just a dream. Good night."
“I can’t sleep because I think I’ll dream about him again.”
“Can I hold your hand?”
“-Take it away.”
This time he shuddered, as if he had heard a terrible sound in a different sense. Paula frowned slightly and sighed secretly.
[Seeing how calmly you do it, you're definitely fine.]
“Can I stay with you until you calm down?”
“-...”
There was no response. After thinking a little, she sat down on the edge of the bed. The round figure trembled from the noise it made while sitting, but did not shout to get out.
As soon as Paula sat down, she had nothing to say. She bent her knees and pressed them to her chest, moving her fingers uselessly. He also had no words. Instead, she could hear the sound of sharp breathing. Listening to the gradually fading sound, she guessed his condition.
She continued to move her hand, and the light suddenly narrowed on her hand. When she raised her head, the moonlight coming through the gap in the curtains fell onto the floor. Her gaze passed through the light and settled on the pale yellow moon as she looked out the window.
The only light that illuminated the darkness was beautiful enough to draw her eyes to it.
Pretty.
If you reach out to him, you will feel it.
Warm.
However, no matter how hard she stretched out her hand, grabbing the moon was absurd.
Knowing this, she reached for the light.
It was quiet.
It was calm.
It was peaceful.
She had never felt so peaceful in her life.
“When I was little, my brother often had nightmares.”
She bit her lip subconsciously. Perhaps the silence was painful.
Suddenly the sound of breathing stopped. But he didn't stop her.
“It was my second son, and after he had a nightmare, I woke up to my brother crying.”
The second son was an innocent child. Unlike her, he had a handsome face, and he always had a sweet smile, and he followed her around, calling her all the time.
At the same time, she felt sorry for such a sweet younger brother. He was a good boy, but poverty was poison. Her father used to look at his young and handsome son, thinking about how to use him.
And although he was young, his younger brother could not sleep because he knew how things were. He often woke her up crying as she tossed and turned, probably having nightmares each time. She then hugged her little brother and patted him on the back, even while she was half asleep. He held her hands.
Just like now.
She put her hand on the only one sticking out of the sheet. The girl felt a tingling sensation from the sudden touch. The body temperature in his hand was cold, and she squeezed it tightly.
“Every time this happened, I would hold my brother’s hand like this. Then my brother would feel relieved and fall asleep again.”
Her brother squeezed her hand tightly and closed his eyes. With tears in his eyes, her little brother usually fell asleep, relying solely on the warmth of her hand. She patted the back of his hand, as if to comfort the younger man as he shared his fear with her.
“And I said that nightmares are just nightmares anyway, you don’t need to be afraid, I’m here. This moment is with me, real.”
But now that she thought about it, it wasn't very good either. Because reality was more like hell. However, her kind brother nodded his head and clung to her arms.
Until the day he was sold to a brothel.
" - They usually tell you to leave your nightmares behind. Regardless of whether something that has already happened or something that you are afraid of happens, just brush it off as a meaningless dream. If you cannot brush it off in this way, you can overcome what has already happened and try to prevent what you are afraid of."
Then she closed her mouth tightly. It was more like a dream.
Reality was not a fairy tale. It was not so beautiful, and she could not even dare to have mystical adventures. At least that's how her life turned out.
She couldn't make any bold choices like the protagonist in the story. So, even at the moment when her second child was sold to a brothel, she could not help her younger brother. She couldn't even show the miracle by grabbing her brother's trembling hand and running away with him.
Even though she knew that her kind and handsome little brother was going to be sold to a brothel... He turned away from his smiling brother.
“It's okay, sister. I'm fine.”
The kind and handsome younger brother instead consoled his ugly older sister. She missed her brother who was gone and could only sincerely wish him happiness.
And the next year he died. They said he had an accident. But in reality he was killed. Her little brother looked unhappy the last time she saw him. His whole body was swollen, especially between his crotch, and it was scary to look at. She couldn't even recognize his face.
The girl buried her second child without her father's knowledge. Would you call it a funeral? After the second son was buried next to the place where the youngest was buried. A beautiful flower was picked and placed on his grave. And not so long ago the fourth one also ended up there.
Paula survived by turning a blind eye to the deaths of her brothers and sisters.
Such a bad girl...
“How can you do this?”
Paula woke up from a sudden sound. She could still feel the trembling in her hand, but this time it was different.