Kazan had imagined this moment over and over again.
What will he say when he meets Yasiris again?
How will he start the conversation, how will he lead the conversation, and how will he change her mind?
Will she even change her mind?
Even though he imagined and rehearsed many scenarios, it was all to no avail.
At this moment, as he faced Yasiris, he could only utter one word: “I missed you.”
I miss you like crazy, as much as you can't even imagine.
You were in my thoughts when I opened my eyes and when I closed them, even in my dreams you controlled me, there was no escape.
This is not just longing, it is torment.
The agony of not seeing you, the feeling of living in a world without you was terrible.
It was very difficult.
“It feels good… to see you again.”
How can the word “good” say it all?
Kazan felt like he was finally back to life.
In a world that was covered in grey, Yasiris came as the bearer of colour.
No, he found it.
This was the reward for his determination to stay alive.
But Yasiris may not see it that way.
“Please, let go of me.”
Kazan's predictions were accurate.
For Lessaris, this situation was a nightmare.
The pleading words came out of her automatically, without thinking.
Even if Kazan wasn't physically holding her, she wondered how he found this place, and why he came?
To bring me back.
To drag me to Ozevia and treat me like a doll again.
Because of his pathological obsession.
“There are a lot of women in the world, Your Majesty.
I know you love my body, but there is no need to be so attached to me...”
“Do you think I'm doing this for your body?”
“Didn't you say that?”
Kazan opened his mouth to respond, but no sound came out.
She was right, he had said so himself.
When Yasiris became the prey of the nobility.
When he heard about her physical condition at the labor office.
When they were stranded together.
Memories of the past piled up one after another, choking his neck.
She blocked his path, mocking him for not being able to deny it now.
“Why did you do that then?
"You should have treated me well from the beginning."
Even though Yasiris in front of him was motionless, her voice echoed in his ears.
He felt nauseous and dizzy.
But he didn't give up.
After everything he had gone through to find her, he wasn't going to let the past hold him back.
His cracked voice came out from his lips: “Not a single moment has passed...”
It took time to complete.
He carefully refined the heart he had carried for so long, and finally revealed it.
“I didn't love you there.”
Thinking now, it was like that.
Even when he hated Yasiris because of a misunderstanding, he always moved for her.
First, fill every place you go with what you love.
Not only the Empress's palace, even the road to the Emperor's palace was decorated with things she liked.
When dining together or attending banquets, he would order foods that suited her taste.
Because she hated Osivia, he always closed the carriage curtains, and chose the best guards in the empire to protect her.
Although he sometimes set traps for her to control her, when he interfered in Beren's politics, he tended to favor what she might want.
He knew her political vision concerned with the people, and he fulfilled her small hypotheses that they had discussed in the past.
If he really hated her, he wouldn't have done it.
When he stubbornly kept it next to him and prevented anyone from touching it.
The thorn of her alleged betrayal was embedded in his heart, making him unable to express himself directly, but he loved her every moment he deliberately ignored her.
...But his honesty did not reach her.
“What Your Majesty did is not love, but obsession.”
Yasiris held her hands behind her back to hide her trembling, and stared at Kazan.
The fear of publicly denying the Emperor mixed with unbridled anger, and he exploded.
How dare he talk about love?
How dare he.
“From our first meeting, you killed my fiancé.
Then you took me by force.
You mocked me, blamed me, and left me vulnerable to the talk of the nobles.”
Yasiris remembered her first night when she wished to die.
The feeling of embracing her enemy was terrifying.
The rebellion was of no use, and when she tried to bite her tongue to die, he threatened her with Beren, so she had no choice but to accept him.
Every night with Kazan was a nightmare.
Every lonely morning her tears of guilt and humiliation would dry.
It took months for her to stop crying.
She could not die despite her desire, and she lived without feeling alive, held hostage, enduring time.
How many whispers have I heard that make fun of her as a woman selling her body.
She watched her honor and her country fall into the mud, and she became an object of ridicule.
She could not bring a maid from her homeland, so she was completely alone.
Now, after she has finally escaped, the Emperor says he loved her and still loves her.
His words were disgusting and infuriating.
“No one treats someone they love this way.
Even animals don’t do what Your Majesty did, and talk about love?
Say that you miss my body frankly.
That’s more acceptable.”
There was a short silence.
Kazan seemed to want to say something, but he said her name in a harsh voice: “Sari.”
"Don't call me that.
I didn't let you call me affectionately."
“…Empress.”
"If you really love me like you just said, come back.
It's the only thing you can do for me."
Kazan closed his eyes sadly.
He wanted to avoid her intense gaze, even for a moment.
The woman he had searched for so desperately was in front of him, but he couldn't face her properly.
What a farce.
He pulled himself together and forced his eyes open.
This was not unexpected.
But he never imagined it would be this painful.
In the quiet space, the pattering sound of rain made his presence known.
Although the rain was weakening, Kazan did not lower the umbrella, continuing to protect Yasaris from the natural cold, and spoke slowly: “You have given birth to a child.”
Kazan deliberately changed the subject to ease the tension, as if to say they had a child.
Her eyes were full of love for Michael, so he thought he had a chance.
If she hated him so much, she wouldn't have raised his child with love.
This was a hope that helped
But he did not expect that Yasiris would suddenly turn pale, lose her composure and stutter.
“The baby...Michael, it's my baby...”
Not your child.
Yasiris could not utter the words of denial.
She had to deny herself any means to protect Michael, but as a mother, she couldn't.
The problem was that she didn't know how much Kazan knew and from where.
If he knew Michael's appearance, it would be difficult to make up the child's origin.
His appearance and age clearly show that he is their child.
I should have run away from the beginning.
Once I knew his identity, I had to take Michael and run for cover.
In the head of Yesaris, who was half rational and remorseful, there was a strong sentence repeating.
This fear, which settled as a shock, was the biggest reason for her leaving Ozevia.