# Chapter 29
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It looked a little different from the Pansion Entera I remembered.
Although the previous Pansion was a knight as strong and formal as cast iron, the man in front of me felt relaxed and comfortable for some unknown reason.
They say that war changes many things that are invisible to the eye.
The Rockherd during that long period felt rougher than an unsanded board, but the Pansion was just the opposite.
Nezar seemed to be the only one who was the same as before in everything except appearance.
Could it be that Cheolongseong was Nezar and not Pansion?
"Yes, I had fun.
Mr.
Pansion...
...
No, I'm happy that the Little Duke looks healthy too."
He smiled sweetly at my words.
It was a strange feeling to find the expression I had always seen under the sun in the early morning darkness.
I thought it was a kind, friendly smile, but perhaps because it was obscured by blurry smoke, it felt a little frustrating.
"What makes you out so late in the morning?"
"I passed out very early and couldn't sleep.
I didn't know there were other people besides me who had trouble sleeping.
"If it's okay, can I have a smoke?"
Pansion, who had a finger-sized cigarette in his mouth, handed me a white pipe.
As I looked around curiously, smelling it and putting it in my mouth, he held out a crude-looking lighter.
"Have you never smoked before?"
"yes."
"That's surprising.
When I light it, inhale deeply."
It's surprising, what does it mean?
A bright red flame lit up right in front of me.
Whenever I liked to drink tea, I couldn't remember seeing any of the women who didn't like to smoke.
At least Charon, who had a weak bronchial system, avoided smoking, but even he smoked frequently while enjoying horseback riding.
Is it because I still have memories of my past life?
Having a very negative perception of smoking, I started to get curious when I saw that many people here liked to smoke regardless of their gender or age.
As the sun set and my vision darkened, I was filled with confidence for no reason.
Or maybe it was because I met Pan Shion half asleep.
Whatever the reason, the important thing is that at that moment I felt the taste of cigarette smoke for the first time.
The feeling was simple.
Very bad.
"Cold cold...
...
.
"It's exactly how I imagined it."
What part of this performance do people find attractive?
Even leaving aside the smoke going down my throat, the smoke coming out of the pipe was the worst.
Even considering Pansion's sincerity, it was impossible to throw it away.
Feeling like I was dying, I moved the cigarette away from my face and exhaled the smoke.
"The first sensation is not very sweet.
But for some reason, cigarettes suddenly...
...
?"
I involuntarily scrunched up my face and looked at Pan Shion.
His cigarette had already turned into a cold butt, rolling around in the ashtray on the outside table.
"It would be weird if everyone smoked, but I didn't."
When I responded with a slight shrug, he smiled slightly.
"Is it weird if I don't do it when other people do it?"
"Instead of...
Doing something a little different from others makes you stand out.
"I don't think I'm very happy about it."
"You speak as if you've had a similar experience."
It was a rather strange question, but I thought it would be funny to give a vague answer and at the same time answer it well, so I answered briefly.
"That's right.
"I'm not a very sociable person."
I realized this even more intensely, especially after Nezar, who was always by my side, left.
In the beginning, it wasn't normal for me to not be able to make friends except Charonte for over 5 years.
Come to think of it, I wasn't used to having casual conversations like this with other people.
"That doesn't seem very trustworthy.
"I feel like you're sociable enough."
"Mine?
Are you serious?
"Which direction?"
I turned my head in a good mood and the cigarette ash that I couldn't get rid of fell out.
I pushed the lit end of the cigarette a little further between my increasingly hot fingers.
Pan Shion blinked as if embarrassed by my aggressive question, but then slowly opened his mouth.
"This is purely my opinion, but I don't remember meeting anyone other than Lord Lockherd and Lord Breight who spoke to me as comfortably as you did."
"Is that a compliment?
"In fact, other than Charon, you are the first person I have spoken to so comfortably."
In the darkness, I could see Pan Shion's brow frowning slightly.
At that moment, the cigarette that was hanging far away was only a finger long, so I crushed it into the ashtray without hesitation.
That's the right way to do it, right?
Out of fear, I didn't look away until the flame was completely extinguished.
"I can't believe it's my first time.
"Isn't there a problem with their conversational style?"
"I think the problem is with me.
"Maybe because I'm so aware of it, I get nervous even with simple greetings."
Of course, this only happened when it came to girls of the same age.
Maybe it was influenced by my brothers, but I never had difficulty making eye contact when dealing with men.
it is not?
It was a different feeling when I thought about my heart pounding when I met Pan Shion.
However, other than Nezar, Pansion was the first person whose first impression was so strong.
I thought it would be okay to make an exception.
"I didn't plan on lamenting my situation like this, but somehow the words came out.
"Please listen to what I said today."
I don't know if it was because it was night, but I didn't even feel that common feeling of shame.
Well, at least we only exchanged a few words.
When I raised my hand and brought it to my nose, an unpleasant smell of cigarette smoke came out.
Even though I gently squeezed my hands due to the discomfort, the strong smell had no way of going anywhere.
"I don't think it will be forgotten easily, but if you want, I'll try."
Well, it won't be so easy to forget that my sister's close friend, who comes to visit me for dinner, is a social misfit.
Pan Shion, who was looking at my face, turned around and turned on the lantern on the outdoor table.
As I turned my head, unfamiliar with the sudden brightness of my vision, he handed me a flashlight.
"It's too late.
"I think you should go back to your room now."
I was a guest of Entera, and a guest is in a position to obey the host's requests.
I obediently took the flashlight and raised my head.
The fire within his purple eyes flickered as if it was about to explode.
"Can I ask you something?"
"Go ahead."
"Are there any good men out there?"
An awkward silence passed between them for a moment.
"I don't want so much...
....
Just being a confident man in front of His Majesty Nezar is enough."
Pansion swallowed slowly, as if pondering the meaning of my question.
"To be proud without having anything is arrogance and bravado.
"You are the type of person I do not want to introduce you to, my lady."
The calm voice contained a very valid meaning.
I shook my head, looking into eyes that immediately regained peace.
"That's absolutely correct.
...
...Still, if you're around, think about it at least once."
Rumors are unreliable.
You will only find out if you are this type or not when you meet them.
Finally, Pan Shion laughed loudly and nodded slightly.
It was the most natural and affected smile I had ever seen on his face.
***
As soon as Rockherd opened his eyes, he let out a groan.
It would be more appropriate to say that it came out spontaneously rather than spitting it out.
He slowly stood up and drank the prepared port of water without stopping.
My mouth was dry, probably because I drank alcohol, which I had abstained from drinking for several years, like a loose horse.
Right now, my memories are blurry from yesterday when the victory party ended.
From then on, everyone started crawling on four legs.
He went straight to Nezhar's office, fulfilling only the minimum formality that must be maintained in the imperial castle.
Ron, who was leaving just as he was closing the door, recognized Rockherd and smiled slightly.
"You two look like you just escaped from hell.
He wasn't like this the day he came back.
After all, the real enemy was inside?"
I always felt this way, but even the smallest words spoken by this cunning aide to the crown prince seemed to pierce my bones.
Lockheed said, frowning as he smelled the alcohol still near his nose.
"For the first time in a long time, I put it in without thinking and it tasted like death.
It still feels like the ceiling is spinning.
"Is Nezar in there?"
"There you are.
Judging by your appearance, it looks like you've been up all night.
Should I tell them to stop?
"Please."
Lockheed, unable to guess why, walked past Ron and into Nezhar's office.
As befits a late morning, the spacious study-style office was filled with pure white sunlight.
Nezar, wearing glasses, silently flipped through the pages of a book at a table in the middle of it all.
Lockheed closed the door quietly and fell into a chair.
At the same time, Nezar's low voice was heard.
"You woke up early too."
Hearing this, it was like scraping basalt from the bottom of the sea.
It was a harsh and unrefined sound.
"Have you been walking around the castle all night?
"What's wrong with your voice?"
His resistance was even more monstrous than his own, who had been swinging his sword as if he had been eating since he was an adult.
However, despite Rockherd's question, Nezar's eyes were still focused on the book.
"Rockherd."
"one."
"Marquis Pearl Welts has shown interest in you.
"My eldest daughter debuted this year."
"...
...
"Are you really telling me to date a man?"
Only then did Nezar look at Rockherd with nervous eyes beyond the lenses.
"Where the hell did you hear you had an older daughter?"
"hate."
Rockherd shook his head resolutely and looked away.
"The reason I agreed to help you was on the condition that my private life would not be interfered with.
"Your position is not so bad that you cannot live without the marquis."
Instead, after the war of conquest ended, Nezar's position became increasingly solid.
This meant that Prince Andrew, son of the current Empress, could no longer run amok with just the Emperor's favor behind his back.
"I only told you this because the Marquis kept repeating the same thing over and over, to the point where his ears tingled.
“That means if you are interested, you should visit the Marquis.”
"A woman younger than Kate.
"I would rather tell you to raise a child."
Nezar laughed at those words and slowly took off his glasses.
"Did you really say that after seeing Kate yesterday?"
Rockherd looked at Nezhar approaching the table he was sitting at.
Yesterday's Kate.
Remembering the moment of our reunion, I was surprised, but it certainly didn't go unnoticed.
Was it because I inadvertently thought it would still be the same?
The dissatisfied expression on his face was still the same, but everything else was very different.
Her cheeks, which were particularly chubby compared to those of girls her age, disappeared like the shadow of a ghost, and she stood taller than a peanut, towering over her mother's shoulders.
Besides being mature, I never thought he would appear with his shoulders slumped over his head.
Thinking about his younger brother pretending to be a lady, Rockherd suddenly felt depressed.
“It’s definitely grown to the point where I couldn’t recognize it over the years.
"Now it would be perfect to just get married."