## Part One: The Confession
"Confession?" I echoed.
"Yes. That's my wish," Hannah said firmly. "Before we return from the capital to Rowen."
I felt my face flush. "Hannah, that's..."
"Why wouldn't that be a wish for me?" She erased her playfulness, speaking with sudden seriousness. "Lady. He's your husband. I expected you two would struggle, but look at you now. You've grown close."
"But—"
"Why are you so uncertain?"
I had no confident answer. It had only been four months since I arrived at Rowen. Even though Kaian treated me kindly and we seemed to get along well, he was the one who'd hurt me in the past. An extremely cold-hearted man. If circumstances changed, if opportunity arose, couldn't he become cruel again?
"I want to tell him, but..." My voice trailed off, exhausted and weak.
It was only recently that I'd stopped believing only death would free me from suffering. Kaian was the first man I'd ever cared about. How could spending nights with him—breathing together, touching, being held—not be precious?
I didn't question what he felt when he came to see me. I only knew that I loved him.
He was the first to offer me salvation from my sleepless hell.
"That's not important to this marriage," I tried to convince myself.
Sometimes I imagined his expression if I confessed. Of course I wanted to know his true feelings. Part of me desperately wished he'd give me his heart.
But it was all my desire, born from my own weakness.
Our marriage existed only by the King's command—to reconcile ancient enemies. It wasn't like ordinary marriages where people shared hearts. If I rashly revealed my feelings, the consequences could be devastating. My seemingly peaceful daily life might shatter.
The biggest variable was myself. If I hadn't cared for him, I could have ignored the Duke of Vermont's wishes. If Kaian hadn't changed so much, even if called back to Valmonde, I might have welcomed the escape.
"It's not important," I said quietly. "The only thing that matters is that I followed the King's orders."
Hannah stamped her foot in frustration. "What's important is your happiness!"
Madame Marcel, watching beside her, joined in. "Lady. What are you afraid of? You don't know how much the Duke cares for you."
I laughed bitterly. "There's nothing left around me that I care about. That's why I'm terrified. I'm afraid my greed and curiosity will destroy everything."
Hannah's face stiffened as understanding dawned.
She knew. She was the only person who could fully understand the weight of what I was saying.
The sad smile on my face moved Madame Marcel to tears, though she tried to hide it.
"Nothing in this world is permanent," the seamstress said gently, stroking my hair. "We welcome rain that ends droughts. We welcome spring after Valmonde's deadly winter."
I closed my eyes, listening.
"Don't be afraid of change. Even if there are painful moments, something better will come after."
Madame Marcel's voice broke as she spoke, and I felt tears slip down her own cheeks.
"Don't cry," I said, embarrassed.
Hannah, usually so strong, had gone quiet watching Madame Marcel cry.
*What is my happiness?* I wondered. *Is everyone shedding tears like this just to help me find it?*
I felt guilt for making them cry.
"Yes," I finally whispered. "I'll try."
"Really?" Hannah's voice trembled with hope.
"I'll try. Though I'm not sure I'll manage it before we return to Rowen."
The mere thought of confessing made my heart race.
*I can't hide these feelings forever,* I realized. *Unless I never see him again, they'll eventually emerge.*
"Thank you for being here," I said, reaching for Hannah's hand. "But next time you have a wish, make it for yourself. Understand?"
"This is my wish. As long as you're happy, I need nothing else."
Holding Hannah's hand with one hand and Madame Marcel's with the other, I steadied my resolve.
With people supporting me like this, perhaps I could gather the courage to tell him. Even if just once.
---
## Part Two: The Journey
Rain poured down the day we arrived at the capital.
When I slightly opened the carriage cover, water splashed inside relentlessly. I gave up trying to see the outside and quickly closed it again. I'd repeated this several times, but the downpour was too heavy to see through.
"Phew," I sighed.
"Bored?" Kaian asked.
"A little."
"That's rude. Didn't you learn to say no to your husband, even if you're bored?"
"I learned it, but I don't want to lie to you."
Kaian could have reached the royal castle alone in five days. Our journey—ten days from Rowan, then more days stopping to explore villages—had taken nearly three weeks. Yet unlike the journey from Valmonde to Rowen, when I'd felt claustrophobic in a leaky carriage with closed windows, this time I'd never felt bored or confined.
"The trip was wonderful," I said wistfully. "That's why the rain feels so frustrating now."
"Do you want to do something fun?" he asked.
"What?"
Kaian lowered his head, placing his mouth close to my ear, and whispered: "Something dirty."
A tickling sensation spread through my lower back.
Since leaving Rowen, Kaian had only held me at night—though I'd often kept my lamp on until one or two in the morning, reading travel books. He'd never complained, never pressured me.
*Aren't you tired?* I'd asked once.
*Not at all. We'll pass through here tomorrow anyway.*
I'd realized he was simply being considerate. I'd spent years with my heart frozen, afraid of attachment. Now, with this man who'd been distant for months, showing subtle care seemed almost too good to be true.
"What kind of dirty?" I asked.
He just laughed, not answering.
"Why are you smiling?" I protested. "I'm serious!"
His expression sobered slightly. "His smiling face is better in bright places. You're wasting a precious moment in this dim carriage."
I felt truly sorry for that.
"You never back down," he observed.
"I'll do whatever you want."
"Yes. That's desirable."
Just then, the carriage slowed and stopped.
"Are we there?" Kaian muttered, knocking on the carriage door.
The coachman, drenched in rain despite his coat, opened the door and bowed. "My Lord. We've arrived at the capital mansion."
"Good work."
"Your Excellency, a messenger has come from the royal castle."
I blinked as Kaian's expression hardened.
The messenger, soaked despite his umbrella, wore a yellow cape over a white uniform modeled after Oberon's white-walled, gold-roofed castle.
"Duke of Temnes. Greetings to the Duchess," he said formally.
"What is this?" I asked.
"His Majesty requests you stay at the royal castle during your visit."
"Tell him I refuse," Kaian said immediately, without hesitation.
The messenger, flustered, withdrew a letter from his pocket. "If you refuse, His Majesty asked me to deliver this."
Kaian glared at the envelope with cold fury as the coachman closed the door and the carriage resumed moving.
"What did the King say?" I asked curiously.
Kaian handed me the envelope. I withdrew the letter to find only four words written: *This is the King's order.*
I couldn't help but smile awkwardly. "Ah. Haha."
"That bastard," Kaian muttered, abusing His Majesty's name. "He overuses royal commands everywhere."
I'd heard they'd grown up like brothers, so his complaint seemed almost affectionate. Even the King, whom I'd never met, seemed friendly through Kaian's irritation.
*The Duke of Vermont said the King was keeping Kaian in check—that our marriage would help them attack Temnes.* But the young King I'd glimpsed through Kaian was completely different.
*There's no way the King would support the Duke of Vermont if his mother is Kaian's biological aunt.*
A brief, interesting thought.
---
## Part Three: The Royal Castle
When we arrived at the royal castle, servants quickly guided us inside.
"Welcome to Oberon's royal castle," one greeted us with a bow. "I'll show you to your rooms. The Duke, if you'll follow me. The Duchess may go with the maids."
"Wait," Kaian said sharply. "Why are you showing us separate rooms?"
The servant looked confused. "I thought... the Duke of Temnes and the Duchess of Vermont might not wish to share accommodations..."
"There's been a mistake," Kaian interrupted coldly. "One room is sufficient."
---