This love is like a curse (9)
Disclaimer from the translator: the chapter contains scenes that may be unpleasant or disturbing. Particularly sensitive people are advised to refrain from eating while reading.
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After the commotion, Thalia rarely left her outbuilding.
However, thanks to the maids, who tirelessly whispered that she had suddenly gone numb, she learned that the boy who attacked her was none other than the crown prince of the empire and... her half-brother. And that black-haired girl from the birch grove is her stepsister.
She also found out that less than six months had passed since their mother’s death. This means that Thalia and Senevier entered the imperial palace just three weeks after the death of the former Empress Bernadette.
Moreover, Senevier immediately ordered that all traces of the former owner be destroyed. Perhaps that garden behind the main palace is the last remaining corner of Bernadette, which her mother did not have time to erase.
Thalia looked out the window.
The summer rain lashed the garden that her mother had so carefully cultivated. The air was filled with dampness and the smell of wet grass. Plants now seemed to her like ugly monsters.
She closed the curtains. Then, curled up on the bed, she remembered the eyes of the crown prince, full of hatred, the face of her half-sister, white with horror... and the blue-eyed boy who protectively hugged that girl to him and threw an icy look at Thalia.
"Longboat Raedgo Siekan..."
She mindlessly whispered his name, staring at the ceiling. Now that she finally knew his name, it didn't bring her any joy. Because she realized that he would never smile at her.
The former Empress Bernadette came from the house of the Marquises of Oristein, one of the most noble families of Osiria [1], and her mother was a noblewoman from the house of Siekan. The late empress and Barkas were distant relatives. They said she took care of him when, as a child, he was sent to the palace for harsh training.
Perhaps he considered Senevier his sworn enemy.
“And along with her and me...”
Remembering his cold gaze, Talia for the first time in her life regretted that she was Senevier’s daughter. Even her appearance, so similar to her mother’s, now caused not pride, but shame.
Thalia didn't want to feel these feelings.
“It was me who was beaten! Why should I feel guilty? Blame the Crown Prince! I really didn't know anything. What did I do wrong? I'm not bad. I didn't do anything wrong."
Thalia repeated this over and over again.
But as soon as she found herself surrounded by the cold gazes of the servants, all these thoughts instantly fell apart.
Now she understood perfectly the reason for their cruel treatment.
Ice water for bathing, rough rubbing that leaves red marks on the skin; pins that pierce the skin with every change of clothing; a comb that tears hair until there are bloody wounds on the head; and always cold, chilled food...
This was all punishment.
Она знала, что её ненавидят. But things were no better in the Talens’ house, and so at first she didn’t attach any importance to it.
Whenever Thalia felt scared, Senevier would hug her and whisper, “You are the fruit of true love. Don't listen to anyone."
Thalia believed these words and tried to behave with dignity.
But now the mother was not around, and people were only whispering about how kind and noble the former empress was, and how she suffered until her death.
Talia visibly sagged. The head, which she always held high, was now pressed into her shoulders, like a turtle, and her gaze was naturally turned to the floor. The servants, perceiving this change, began to treat her even harsher.
The Emperor, and Seneviere herself, did not show much attention to her - and it seemed that even the fear of punishment among the servants had disappeared.
To them, Thalia wasn't a princess to begin with. She was the one who wounded the heart of their beloved Empress Bernadette. Living proof of shameful betrayal.
Walking along the corridors, she heard whispers. My head was ready to explode. Each insult caused anger and resentment.
But since her birth had brought suffering to so many, she began to think that perhaps such suffering was a fair retribution.
However, things soon came to a head.
It's been two seasons since she ended up in the palace.
That morning, as she went down to breakfast, Thalia felt strangely uneasy. Too many servants lined up against the wall as if they were welcoming her. This foreshadowed something bad.
But, contrary to her expectations, everyone was polite, and the table was laden with food.
As if spellbound, Thalia stared at the silver plate...
Instead of stale bread, the cook brought freshly baked, rosy and crispy bread, with butter. Soon a hot stew with fried quails was placed in front of Thalia, from which fragrant steam emanated.
Последние месяцы ей приходилось постоянно есть отвратительную и скудную еду. And seeing instead of a watery, cold soup like rainwater, a stew with large pieces of meat, she felt so ashamed that her eyes treacherously filled with tears.
Thalia looked around at the servants standing around. Dozens of eyes carefully watched her reaction.
“Have they really stopped wishing me harm? Maybe they forgave and decided to show kindness?”
Thalia picked up her spoon. Scooping up the hot broth, from which steam rose, she brought it to her mouth. The taste of butter, milk, sweetish vegetables - all this softly spread across the mouth.
The taste of hot food, which she had not eaten for so long, made her suddenly hungry. Forgetting about dignity, she began to greedily gobble up the stew.
How long had she been eating like this, not noticing anything around her? Suddenly she felt a strange taste. It wasn't just the unpleasant smell of poorly processed meat - it was much more disgusting. Wrinkling her brow, Talia stared at the plate as if she was trying to pierce it with her gaze.
A muffled laugh was heard behind him.
Talia turned around sharply. All the maids stood with their eyes downcast, their faces absolutely impassive. But she clearly saw how the corners of some of their lips trembled. Cold sweat ran down my back.
After a little hesitation, she began to carefully pick at the plate with a spoon. Moving away the large pieces, she noticed at the bottom what looked like a heavy piece of meat. No. It wasn't meat.
When Thalia fished out this black something with a spoon, her body seemed numb with horror.
In the thick broth lay a swollen gray dead rat with a bared mouth. Even the scream was stuck in my throat.
As if slipping from her chair, Thalia fell and immediately vomited the contents of her stomach onto the stone floor. Even though she vomited more than she ate, the nausea continued.
The smell of a dead rat ate into my nostrils more and more. It seemed that this taste was firmly stuck to the tongue and would never disappear.
Thalia, in desperation, stuck her fingers down her throat, scratching her tongue, trying to squeeze out at least something else, but she couldn’t.
How long did she lie there, writhing on the floor and suffering from nausea? Through the veil of tears in her blurred gaze, legs flashed past the table.
Raising her head, Thalia saw a maid from the kitchen - with complete indifference, she was putting away the dishes, as if nothing had happened. The rest of the servants also moved around busily, wiping tables and taking away plates. As if they didn’t notice the girl lying in a puddle of her own vomit...
Note:
1. Osiria is one of the seven allied kingdoms. Associated with him are the Holy Knights, Cuajel Leon, and the Great Church. From the short story “Under the Oak.”