The wind blowing from the shore of the lake on a winter night, when it seemed that it was about to snow, was cold. Although the man's large back offered some protection, the cold was undeniable.
It was an icy wind, sharp enough to make you forget about spring. It scratched at her exposed ears, nose, and neck, leaving her skin tingling as if the cold had taken too long to seep into her.
However, the air between the two of them, locked in each other's gaze, was different. Amidst the peculiar tension, there was an incomprehensible warmth.
In her ears she heard only the cold wind sliding across the surface of the water. The silence was so deep that she was afraid she might be heard swallowing.
In the darkness, reminiscent of the silence of the night, Tilia looked at Ilex with a blank stare, watching as he fiddled with the ring on his finger, as if trying to endure something.
She had no idea what thoughts were running through his head, marked by his occasional movements of his throat. She also could not understand what desires filled his hazy gray-blue eyes, which resembled the sky shrouded in fog. As always since she met him, Tilia found herself at a loss.
But she was sure of one thing: this man was on the verge of releasing what he had suppressed for a long time.
-... Tilia.
Breaking the long silence, his voice was as quiet as a candle flame trembling in the wind.
- When you go to Ontario...
But Tilia instinctively knew. The spark he was about to throw at her was not something that could be easily extinguished. It was a flame that could completely consume her life, leaving severe burns.
- With me... together...
A feeling of impending doom washed over her. She felt that she was facing a catastrophe that would leave scars on her body and soul. But despite this, Tilia was helpless. She didn't know how to stop him. Perhaps she didn't even want to stop him.
Even when she realized that her fate was about to plunge into a quagmire, she stared blankly at his lips. It was then that a voice called from across the path that they had ignored.
- Ilex.
Tilia shuddered, raised her head, and her gaze fell on an unexpected figure.
Standing before them was Cecelia Clayton, her red hair as bright as her tear-stained, bloodshot eyes.
Quickly looking from Ilex to Tilia and back, Cecilia quickly walked towards them.
- It was true.
Her white breath, rushing out with fury, made it clear that she was not just shaking from the cold.
- Rumors about you two meeting every morning and doing all sorts of things...
Cecilia's slightly trembling voice made Tilia's face turn red in embarrassment.
A few months ago, after Cecilia came to where Tillia was and looked at her for a long time, she showed no further reaction. After much thought, Tilia came to the conclusion that Cecilia's calm was the result of Ilex's intervention. He must have spoken to her beforehand, promising to always wear her ring as a sign of their engagement during his nightly lessons.
Otherwise, Cecilia's tolerance could not explain why the woman's ring, which disappeared during the day but reappeared on his hand at night, did not arouse her wrath.
Thus, Tilia thought that the lessons were to some extent permitted by Cecilia, the future bride. But the rage coming from Cecilia now stunned Tilia.
Cecilia looked at her with murderous intent. Под ледяной синей яростью плечи Тилии слегка сжались. This was not the first time she had been treated as a mistress. She had already experienced such humiliation from Cecilia's friends before the start of the semester.
But strangely enough, this time her feelings were different. Although her lips trembled slightly, her heart was uneasy, as if she was really guilty.
What was that? What made her avoid Cecilia's gaze? Because she felt like she was really lusting after someone else's man, as if she really was an illicit lover?
As soon as she stopped biting her lips, startled by her own thoughts, someone's back suddenly appeared in her field of vision.
Blinking several times, Tilia realized that Ilex had stood in front of her, blocking her view.
Cecilia let out a faint laugh, as if she found the situation ridiculous. When faced with Cecilia, Tilia still maintained her composure. But her heart trembled sharply at the sight that opened before her.
What are you doing?
It was as if he was protecting his mistress from her rightful rival. Tilia became agitated and pushed his shoulder irritably when he blocked her.
- I don't care. Men having mistresses are not that uncommon.
As if driving a wedge, Cecilia muttered in a cold voice. At her words, Tilia’s hands, roughly resting on the man’s strong shoulders, froze in place.
- That mouth of yours...
But Tilia didn't stop because of Cecilia's remark.
- You better keep it closed.
Under her palm, the man's muscles radiated heat, hardening like iron. This was the reaction of a man frozen with rage upon hearing an unimaginable insult.
Pausing for a moment, Tilia carefully removed her hand from his shoulder and stepped to the side to look at his face. But Ilex moved first again. He moved his body to block her view, positioning himself between Tilia and Cecilia.
Cecilia's trembling voice was heard from behind his broad back.
“Even if you look at me like that, it won’t change anything.” You know that, Ilex. In the end, you will become my fiancé...
- Cecilia Clayton.
Pinned behind him, Tilia couldn't see Ilex's face. But one thing she could say for sure: the expression he wore now was one he had never shown her before.
- It seems that my words are not reaching you.
The voice coming from the owner of this broad back was even. However, there was a tension in him, so heavy with suppressed anger that it was impossible not to notice.
As she listened silently, Tilia's expression gradually changed. It was strange. Even though she stood next to the angry man and heard his threatening voice, she did not feel the slightest fear.
On the contrary, somewhere in my chest a warmth began to rise. It was like...
“If you open your mouth again, you will see the worst person you have ever met in your life.”
Protection. Yes, something she had never experienced before - she felt as if she was being protected.
At the sound of his voice, trembling with barely contained rage, Cecilia sobbed and turned to run away. Ilex, who stood like a wall in front of Tilia, remained in place for a long time even after Cecilia disappeared.
Only after a while did he seem to collect his thoughts. Slowly turning his head, he looked at Tilia.
-...Let's go.
His voice, addressed to the girl, who was slightly trembling as if from the cold, sounded muffled, as if he had plunged under water.
***
Although the meeting place before classes often changed, the way back was always the same. A dark alley leading to the back gate of the dorm, used only by the caretakers. The quiet path, dimly lit by the occasional gas lamp, was silent to the point of desolation.
Lost in their thoughts, they walked forward until they finally arrived at their destination.
-...I'll go.
Standing in front of a large leafless tree, Tilia spoke to Ilex, who remained silent, and turned to leave.
- Tilia.
His insistent voice stopped her in her tracks. Her hand, which was reaching for the gate, froze as she turned to Ilex, whose expression became grim.
-...Forget about it.
After a long silence, his words carried an unclear meaning.
After a moment of thought, Tilia spoke, not letting go of the iron gate she was holding.
- Forget what? What did Cecilia say about the two of us being rumored? That she treated me like a mistress? Or that you're going to get engaged to her soon?
She only wanted to clarify his words, but Ilex's face immediately turned pale. He seemed at a loss for words for a moment, looking at her silently, and then his brows furrowed in disappointment.
- All this.
-……
- Forget everything Cecelia Clayton said. None of this is worth remembering.
Listening to his harsh tone, Tilia silently looked into his face. The expression on Ilex Davenport's face was somehow unfamiliar. He looked anxious, as if he was being chased - or perhaps he was chasing something himself.
Realizing that the composure had disappeared from his face, a strange impulse stirred in Tilia's chest. Why? The questions she had to repress during their studies surfaced like fish jumping out of the blue sea.